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Ask not for whom the Iguana stalks, the Iguana stalks for you...

War, politics, religion... & other stuff you shouldn't talk about over dinner...

Dedicated to the proposition that GW Bush and Saddam Hussein are figments of our unconscious minds

Cost of the War in Iraq
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According to Amnesty International, Iraq executes "scores" of political prisoners every year, at least 31 confirmed last year. How long would it have taken Saddam to execute the 6000+ Iraqi civilians we've killed this year? Figure it out.

Cosmic Iguana UPDATED Highlights!

Bush Deified!
Governor Arnold?
Uday & Qusay Get Medals
Aliens Find WMDs!
Republican Affective Disorder
Iraqi Looter's Festival
Ashcroft Eats Babies!
Crypto-Fascists on Parade
The Manchurian President
Tatu Terrorist Organization?
Why They Hate Us
Psychic Bubba?
My Inner Saddam
America as SUV
Don't Watch TV
Iraqi Baseball
Survivor: Iraq
France Attacks!

NEW! Focus on Intelligence The Spy Game by manis2society

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Saturday, April 12, 2003


5. Ho Chi Minh - (actually OSS) Link Result: Vietnam war
4. Manuel Noriega - Link Result: Invasion of Panama
3. Saddam Hussein - Link Result: Gulf War, Invasion of Iraq
2. Osama Bin Laden - Link Result: 9-11, Invasion of Afghanistan
1. Mystery Guest

If you can guess the identity of the Mystery Guest, you will know the location of our next war. Just be assured that our next evil villain will be someone we trained.

BONUS QUESTION: It's just a coincidence isn't it? It's not like we planned for them to do anything, right?

America as SUV Part II
'When I turn on the TV, I see wall-to-wall Humvees, and I'm proud," said Sam Bernstein, a 51-year-old antiquities dealer who lives in Marin County, Calif., and drives a Hummer H2, an S.U.V. sibling of the military Humvee...(From the NYTimes via Tom Tommorrow)

"Those who deface a Hummer in words or deed," he added, "deface the American flag and what it stands for."

As I said, America IS a Hummer!



[WASHINGTON] General William P. Fragmorton, CENTCOM liason in Washington explained today why American forces have been reluctant to crack down on looters.

"Frankly, we identify with them. Isn't that why we're in Iraq? To loot their oil?...Uh, I meant, to liberate them?"

Ricin "poison" was Really Wheat Germ
France Says Substance Found in Train Station Was Wheat Germ

PARIS, April 11 — French investigators said today that the contents of bottles found at a Paris train station last month and believed to be the poison ricin actually consisted of ground wheat germ and barley LINK

Remember, the Bush Administration claimed it may have been made in Iraq.

Wide-Angle Photo of Jubilant Throngs Toppling Saddam's Statue Reveals New Iraqi Secret Weapon!


Yep, it's invisibility. Maybe Saddam is using it too. And Osama, for that matter.

FBI was Told GOP Activist was Double Agent years ago
F.B.I. Was Told Years Ago of Possible Double Agent

WASHINGTON, April 11 — Senior F.B.I. officials were told in the early 1990's that a Los Angeles woman accused this week of being a double-agent appeared to be spying for the Chinese, but they continued using her as an informer nonetheless, current and former officials said today.LINK
According to the Sacramento Bee, "Katrina Leung seemed just the sort of woman the California Republican Party wanted in its ranks."

QUESTION: Is the FBI REALLY this incompetent? Or is there something ELSE going on? Like in the bin Laden investigations- Do they refuse to investigate Republicans?

Blix: US was bent on war

Nicholas Watt, Saturday April 12, 2003, The Guardian

War against Iraq was a foregone conclusion months before the first shot was fired, the chief weapons inspector Hans Blix has claimed.
In a scathing attack on Britain and the US, Mr Blix accused them of planning the war "well in advance" and of "fabricating" evidence against Iraq to justify their campaign.

Friday, April 11, 2003


Orchestrating Statues Falling

HAS IT OCCURRED TO ANYONE that the statues falling might not have been the spontaneous expressions of the peoples jubilation, but instead were deliberately planned by our military to evoke memories of the fall of Communism? After all, it was our marines doing it. And you know how the Bush Administration thinks, i.e. image is EVERYTHING.

UPDATE: is with us on this one. They say, "We Don't Mean to be Nitpickers, But Where Exactly are the Thousands of Iraqis Who Allegedly Participated in the Pulling Down of the Big Saddam Statute? (If This Event Wasn't Choreographed Out of Rove's Office, We'll Eat Some Enron Stock for Breakfast)" Photo

Gulf War Syndrome, The Sequel
'People Are Sick Over There Already'

Steven Rosenfeld,

Soldiers now fighting in Iraq are being exposed to battlefield hazards that have been associated with the Gulf War Syndrome that afflicts a quarter-million veterans of the 1991 war, said a former Central Command Army officer in Operation Desert Storm.
LINK above.

Iraqi nuclear site lay at the mercy of looters
Guards left as U.S. forces neared; Marines did not realize site's significance
By Bob Drogin, Special To The Sun, Originally published April 11, 2003

WASHINGTON - Three Iraqi warehouses filled with 2,500 barrels of uranium that could be enriched for nuclear weapons - plus 150 radioactive isotopes that could be used for "dirty bombs" - lay unguarded for several days this week as Iraqi mobs swirled around.


India thinks Iraq War Justifies Pre-Emptive Strike on Pakistan
Indian defence minister joins Pakistan pre-emptive strike chorus
Fri Apr 11, 5:53 AM ET

JODHPUR, India (AFP) - Defence Minister George Fernandes reiterated Indian warnings that Pakistan was a prime case for pre-emptive strikes.

"There are enough reasons to launch such strikes against Pakistan, but I cannot make public statements on whatever action that may be taken," Fernandes told a meeting of ex-soldiers in this northern Indian desert city on Friday...

...Fernandes said he endorsed Foreign Minister Yashwant Sinha's recent comments that India had "a much better case to go for pre-emptive action against Pakistan than the United States has in Iraq.

It's good to remember that we are always teaching by example.



THE clerics were butchered in a place of faith, under the splendid gold dome of Iraq’s holiest site and burial place of the first Imam of Shia Islam.

Son of a former Grand Ayatollah and leader of Iraq’s Shiite Muslim majority, Abdul Majid al-Khoei, a leading moderate who had spent 12 years in exile in London, was mobbed at the Grand Imam Ali Mosque in Najaf after defending another cleric who had been previously loyal to Saddam Hussein.

Mr al-Khoei, 41, had returned to Iraq under coalition protection on 3 April to help bring order to the city - the third-holiest for the world’s 120 million Shiites behind Mecca and Medina in Saudi Arabia.

Somehow I don't think this bodes well for a peaceful postwar Iraq... Kids, can you say Af-ghan-i-stan?

Iraqis happy to see Saddam go, now waiting for Americans to leave

I think that says it pretty well.

Thursday, April 10, 2003

Saddam was CIA Asset
UPI reports Saddam served CIA for 40 years

U.S. forces in Baghdad might now be searching high and low for Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein, but in the past Saddam was seen by U.S. intelligence services as a bulwark of anti-communism and they used him as their instrument for more than 40 years, according to former U.S. intelligence diplomats and intelligence officials. More

'We shoot them down like the morons they are': US general


Arab fury at Marines flag gesture
09/04/2003 - 6:14:22 pm

There was shock and disbelief at the fall of Baghdad among Arabs today – and also anger at marines wrapping an American flag around a statue of Saddam Hussein...more

Tricky Situation

Kirkuk falls to Kurdish fighters
Associated Press
...Turkey responded to the fall of Kirkuk by warning that continued Kurdish control of the oil-rich city would be unacceptable...Shortly after the fall of Kirkuk was broadcast, a senior diplomat at the Turkish foreign ministry told AFP that any attempt by Iraqi Kurdish forces to take permanent control of the city would be unacceptable.

Ankara later announced that they would be sending military observers to Kirkuk.

Wednesday, April 09, 2003


Now the Iraqi people will have to vote (at least mentally) on the following question: Are you better off than you were 4 weeks ago? Saddam is more or less gone, to be replaced by a Corporate Figurehead. Sanctions will be gone, but whose fault were they really -Saddam's or ours? If no WMDs are found the answer may not be pleasing. And the cost /benefit ratio will be weighed against the 1000 confirmed civilian deaths tabulated by everyone's favorite website

According to Amnesty International, Iraq executes "scores" of political prisoners every year, at least 31 confirmed last year. How long would it have taken Saddam to execute 1000 more Iraqis? Figure it out. Our civilized Chinese allies execute 3000 people a year. Maybe Iraq isn't so "civilized," and they certainly are less efficient.

Question: If an Iraqi dies in the desert, and no one sees him, is he still dead?

Statutory Rape?
By Morpheus

Even though there is much humor in this war of statues; there is a cosmological gravity to it also. The 21st century is the era that ends for once and all the rule of dictators. Perhaps President Bush may engage his shadow side and become a democratic dictator, in which case he too may be toppled. What you conquer, often conquers you. The medium is the message, and the message is the media. Information is the key to the shackles of verbal democracy.

Does it matter who disposes of the shadows? I think not, even if it is another shadow. Evnetually all the shadows must be returned to the self that cast them. No one is asking why this came about. It's simplistic to say oil, of course it is about oil, by why are those the choices? Why does man choose these problems? What are we working through on the road to the land of the Axis, ecces, exes, axes of Evils (Elvis, hmm?)?

UPDATE: I can't help but think that Russia is suffering from a Twilight Zone episode. They're protesting after the statues fall? Is this a plot by the Russians and French to join in the war? What are they protesting? Maybe their scared they might make the A-E list (Axis of Elvis list).This similiar to college students protesting having to go to high school...and where were these protestors when their commandos gassed its own citizens and their own terrorist? I say we not only protest French Fries, but Smirnoff too.

Syria Added to Axis of Evil

(George Bush City, Iraq) Donald Rumsfeld today added Syria to the Axis of Evil list of America's enemies. "Look, we've taken out Iraq," he said standing on Saddam's statue, "Now there's an opening on the Axis of Evil we've got to fill."

When asked why, Rumsfeld responded, "We like to keep a good supply of wars ready, so we won't run out."

Reporters pointed out that Iraq was not completely pacified and Saddam himself might still be at large, but Rumsfeld countered with, "Hey it's a voodoo thing. If we topple his statute, he's toppled, if we crumble it, his regime is crumbled."

When asked who would follow after Iran, Syria and N.Korea were invaded, Rumsfeld ruminated, "Could be anyone... France, Germany, Canada, whoever pisses us off...."

Footage shows tank deliberately hit hotel

April 9 2003, Baghdad, Footage filmed by France 3 television of a strike on a hotel which killed two journalists in Baghdad today shows a US tank targeting the journalists' hotel and waiting at least two minutes before firing.

Herve de Ploeg, the journalist and film editor who filmed the attack, said: "I did not hear any shots in the direction of the tank, which was stationed at the west entrance of the Al-Jumhuriya (Republic) bridge, 600 metres north-west of the hotel.

The tank's turret is seen moving toward the Palestine Hotel, where foreign reporters have set up shop, and the gun carriage lifting and waiting at least two minutes before opening up.

The French TV channel had positioned two cameras in two rooms facing the bridge as of 6:30am (11:30 local time).

"It had been very quiet for a moment. There was no shooting at all. Then I saw the turret turning in our direction and the carriage lifting. It faced the target," said De Ploeg.

"It was not a case of instinctive firing," he said

CIA Says Pentagon Choice for Iraq is the Wrong Man for the Job
CIA report slams Pentagon's favorite Iraqi
By Eli J. Lake, UPI State Department Correspondent

WASHINGTON, April 7 (UPI) -- The Central Intelligence Agency issued a report last week claiming that the opposition leader airlifted by the Pentagon to Iraq over the weekend, Ahmad Chalabi, would not be an effective leader to replace Saddam Hussein because many Iraqis do not like him.

Nothing like getting off on the right foot.

Saddam Hasn't Fallen
Despite CNN's Banner. More accurate is their headline on the 2nd page:
Symbol of Saddam's rule toppled
His statue that is. No one that I know has ever doubted the US would take over Iraq and install a new regime. The question is what happens afterwards. In Afganistan, it's not looking so good:

BAGRAM AIR BASE, Afghanistan (CNN) -- A bomb dropped by a U.S. warplane missed its intended target in southern Afghanistan early Wednesday, killing 11 civilians and wounding another, a U.S. military statement said. LINK

Two US airmen are missing and 2 Special Forces killed in the last 2 weeks (plus a non-combat Helicopter crash killing 6), more casualties than the last six months there. Can that be what is in store for Iraq? Quite Possibly...

Steve Gilliard at Kos has a good analysis of the possible pitfalls

Tuesday, April 08, 2003

New tape purported to be from Osama bin Laden urges suicide attacks

ISLAMABAD, Pakistan (AP) - A new audiotape purportedly from Osama bin Laden exhorts Muslims to rise up against Kuwait, Saudi Arabia and other governments it claims are "agents of America," and calls for suicide attacks against U.S. and British interests to "avenge the innocent children" of Iraq.

WAIT... isn't he supposed to be dead, too?

Saddam fled Baghdad 3 days ago: Ex-aide

Press Trust of India
London, April 6 As US Forces tightened their grip on Baghdad, Iraqi President Saddam Hussein, along with his two sons, fled the capital three days ago for his home town of Tikrit, 175 km to the north, media reports said.

"I have been informed that once he had firm evidence that the Americans were closing in on Baghdad, he fled to his home town of Tikrit," claimed Haitham Rashid Wihaib, Saddam's former Chief of Protocol in The Mail.

The dictator who used to being ferried around in a vast fleet of heavily armoured Mercedes left by way of anonymous taxis and battered pick up trucks in a convoy which would have looked like any other group of fleeing Iraqis.

Fool me once?

'Nerve Gas' is Actually Pesticide

....chemicals found at the facility near Baghdad turned out to contain nothing more lethal than pesticide, not nerve agents, as has previously been claimed. LINK

I am wondering if we are seeing a pattern here. Keep saying you found chemical weapons, so what if it gets disproved? Isn't that how they convinced the American public Saddam was behind 9-11?

Three journalists killed in Baghdad

BAGHDAD, Iraq (CNN) -- Two journalists were killed by an explosion at the Palestine Hotel and an Al-Jazeera TV reporter died when an airstrike hit a building housing the Arab media on Tuesday during intense but sporadic warfare in central Baghdad, the respective news services said. LINK

Hmm. Were they aiming at Peter Arnett?

Monday, April 07, 2003

Late night Hope for the Humor deprived

Letterman -# No one knows if Saddam is still alive. They keep showing old footage of him on TV saying that it’s live. You know, it’s like the same thing we do with Dick Cheney.

Conan -# President Bush says that he feels he has been called by God to lead the country in this difficult time. He was actually called by a morning zoo DJ. But he did win the contest.

Leno-# This week Donald Rumsfeld issued stern warnings to Iranians and Syrian people telling them not to cross the border into Iraq. We’ll be watching, don’t try to cross the border. Good luck, we can’t stop them from crossing the border in Tijuana.

Leno-# On Friday, the United States bombed Saddam Hussein’s personal luxury yacht. That’s when you know Republicans are out to get you, when they blow up your yacht. There is no meaner crime! More


Taliban Reviving, Afghan Gov't Faltering
...At a time when the United States is promising a reconstructed democratic postwar Iraq, many Afghans are remembering hearing similar promises not long ago.

Instead, what they see is thieving warlords, murder on the roads, and a resurgence of Taliban vigilantism.

"It's like I am seeing the same movie twice and no one is trying to fix the problem," said Ahmed Wali Karzai, the brother of Afghanistan's president and his representative in southern Kandahar. "What was promised to Afghans with the collapse of the Taliban was a new life of hope and change. But what was delivered? Nothing. Everyone is back in business."

Need I say anything more?

Maybe THIS explains some things...
[Washington Post reporter] Milbank said reporters have become complacent and given up their aggressive style. He called this situation "the Prozac newsroom," and joked that 40 percent of Washington Post reporters were on some kind of anti-depressant.

LINK why the American public believes Saddam was behind 9-11.

I think I need an anti-depressant...

Iraq War Index

77: Percentage of Americans who support military action against any country believed to be linked to 9/11 terrorist attacks, even if innocent civilians are killed in those countries.

69: In a 2002 poll, percentage of Americans who said they believe Iraq has nuclear weapons.

O: Number of nuclear warheads in Iraq.

53.9: Estimated number of U.S. troops over the age of 20 deemed to be overweight by federal obesity standards.

$850 billion: Estimated military spending in the world in 2002.

50: Percentage spent by U.S.

0.0015: Percentage spent by Iraq.

50 per cent: Spending increase on U.S. national defence projected between 2000 and 2007.

320 metric tonnes: Amount of depleted uranium left in region after 1991 Gulf War.

200,000: Estimated number of U.S. soldiers said to be suffering from Gulf War Syndrome.

700: Between 1991 and 94, percentage increase in cancer rates in Iraq.

1 in 6: Chance the U.S. bombed Iraq on any given day last year.

9: Percentage of U.S. munitions dropped during the first Gulf War that were classified as precision-guided.

75: Percentage used during current war.

98: During the first Gulf War, the reported "success rate" (or percentage of accurate strikes) by Tomahawk cruise missiles.

10: Pentagon's estimated "success rate" after the war ended.

$750,000: Unit cost of one Tomahawk cruise missile.

725: By Thursday morning, number of Tomahawks used in Iraq.

6: Of the 10-member commission created to investigate the 9/11 terrorist attacks, the number who have direct links to the airline industry.

$3 million: Budget given to commission.

$9 billion: Estimated monthly cost for U.S. to sustain war in Iraq.

$100 billion: Estimated cost of Iraq "reconstruction."

$7.4 billion: Amount U.S. will spend on missile defence research and development this year.

70: The percentage increase in wealth gap between the top 10 per cent of American families with highest incomes and the 20 per cent of families with lowest incomes between 1998 and 2001.

400: Number of French products and companies suggested for boycott on several Web sites.

18: Number of times France has invoked its veto in United Nations history.

76: Number of times the U.S. has used its veto.

1,200: Number of American historians who signed a petition last year demanding the Bush administration respect the U.S. Constitution with respect to declaration of war.

54 to 67: By 2020, estimated percentage of crude oil that will come from Persian Gulf.

2: As a measure of proven oil reserves, ranking of Iraq among all countries.

6: Percentage of the world's population living in the U.S.

30: Percentage of the world's energy resources used in the U.S.

89: Percentage of Americans who rely on television as their first source of news during war in Iraq.

92: Between Sept. 14, 2002 and Feb. 7, 2003, percentage of news stories airing on NBC, ABC and CBS that originated directly from White House, Pentagon or State Department.

67: Between March 25 and 27, percentage of U.S. television viewers who said they felt "sad watching the war coverage."

83: Percentage of U.S. television viewers who say they now want a return to entertainment programming.

236,202: The number of times Osama bin Laden was mentioned in international media reports between Sept. 11, 2001 and Sept. 11, 2002.

57, 667: The number of times Osama bin Laden was mentioned between Sept. 11, 2002 and today.

66,648: The number of times Saddam Hussein was mentioned between Sept. 11, 2001 and Sept. 11, 2002.

225,147: The number of times Saddam Hussein was mentioned between Sept. 11, 2002 and today.

Oct. 2, 2002: Date the American Gulf War Veterans Association called for the resignation of U.S. Defence Secretary Donald Rumsfeld after he denied the U.S. sent biological weapons to Iraq during the 1980s.

38: In a 2002 poll, percentage of Americans who said Canada should be annexed.

13: Percentage of Americans between the ages of 18 and 24 who could find Iraq on a map prior to the war.

16,000: Number of inactive military ranges in the U.S. that have unexploded munitions that pose serious environmental hazards.

1.5 million: Number of Internet "hits" the Iraq Body Count Web site has had since the war began.

52: Percentage of these visitors who are from the United States.

50: Percentage of weapons entering the global market that come from American firms.

10: Percentage of U.S. military spending that would provide global population with basic necessities.

1: Number of countries that have used nuclear weapons against another country.

From: Vinay Menon, Toronto Star

Russians Pissed.

Agonist reports: The Russian ambassador to Baghdad, Vladimir Titorenko, slightly wounded in his attempt to reach Syria on Sunday, accused U.S. forces of "deliberately" firing on the his diplomatic convoy, according the press agency RIA Novosti, who has a correspondent at the Syria-Iraq border. The Russian press has also joined in making accusations this morning, citing witnesses that claim that the convoy was probably targeted by U.S. special forces or recon units. According to Russian newspapers, The Americans had been informed of the diplomatic convoy's exact composition and timetable on Saturday. LINK

Well, as Bush says, "If you're not with us, you're against us."

How Good is Homeland Security?

Read this and weep(also via Tom at HNN).

Meanwhile, Republicans keep trying to cut Homeland Security funding by billions.

Do they want more terrorist attacks? Sure looks like it. (But [see below] they don't want us to find out).

You Can't HANDLE the Truth, Part 105,968

Tom at HNN blogs: Republicans in Congress, more than happy to spend tens of millions of dollars on Whitewater and Bill Clinton's penis and who have recently approved $50M to investigate the Columbia accident, somehow can't find the paltry sum of $11M to investigate the attacks that led to the deaths of 3,000 Americans. LINK

And of course, you knew that the appointed 9-11 investigators couldn't get security clearances to do their jobs. You did know that didn't you?

You Can't Say it Better Than This:

by Ted Rall:

BASRA, Iraq -- Ali Hassan al-Majid, dubbed "Chemical Ali" by opponents of the Iraqi regime for ordering a poison gas attack that killed thousands of Kurds, has been found dead, a British officer said Monday.
from LA Times

Sunday, April 06, 2003

Fahrenheit 911 or Executive Action?

Many of you know that Michael Moore, recent Oscar Winner for "Bowling for Columbine" has taken on a new project, exploring the Bush-Bin Laden connection in Fahrenheit 911.

Frankly, I'm worried. Michael Moore is probably the one and only person who is able to take on the powers that be and he is not expendable. Unfortunately, people who take on the Bushes directly often end up dead. Most recently, Bush biographer JW Hatfield and Enron executive Cliff Baxter, both of whom ended up mysterious suicides, Baxter with a forged suicide note.

The controversial website Bush Body Count lists quite a number of other mysterious deaths, suicides, plane crashes, auto crashes of those who take on the Bushes. I hope Michael has someone to watch his back.

Incontrovertible Proof

Press conference:
Question: Mr President, what is the proof that Iraq has weapons of mass destruction?
Bush: We kept the receipts.

More jokes

New Iraq Interim Government

From South Knox Bubba:
The Administration announced today that the a new interim government has been installed in Iraq.

Ari Fleischer, noting the Iraqi people's wish for "Democracy, Whiskey, and Sexy", said Administration officials concluded that clearly there was only one logical choice for Interim Prime Minister of the new Interim Government: Snoop Doggy Dogg. LINK (with cool Pic)

Sorry, The War Ain't Over Yet
Kos points out:
Claims by the Coaltion that they were "in the heart of Baghdad" can be disproven if you look at the map.
All they did today, besides getting a soldier killed, was prove they can drive on a highway....

...Until there is a logical explaination as to the dissappearance of the Iraqi Army from the field, assume it is in hiding. US commanders are claiming they are destroying divisions and they don't have the scale of prisoners they should. The math doesn't add up.

If an army is collapsing, there would be signs. Desertions, and the like. Without that. they're hiding and that's not a good thing.

More Empty Warheads Discovered


Afghan Situation Continues to Deteriorate
Karzai Ally Gunned Down in Afghanistan

By KATHY GANNON, Associated Press Writer, Apr. 5, 2003

KANDAHAR, Afghanistan (AP) - A close ally of Afghan President Hamid Karzai was gunned down in southern Afghanistan in an attack provincial officials blamed on the Taliban Saturday.... .... There are fears that Taliban remnants are reorganizing in an effort to destabilize Karzai's government. There have been several pamphlets, so-called "night letters," warning Afghans against working with foreigners and threatening those that do with death.

A new edict purportedly issued by fugitive Taliban leader Mullah Mohammed Omar just two weeks ago threatened more attacks, declared a holy war against international forces and told Afghans they would be considered enemies if they keep working with the government.

U.S.: Iran will infiltrate 5 Iraqi cities

By Eli J. Lake
UPI State Department Correspondent, 4/3/2003 7:37 PM

WASHINGTON, April 3 (UPI) -- Iran's senior leadership decided last month to send irregular paramilitary units across their border with Iraq to harass American soldiers once Saddam Hussein's regime fell, according to U.S. intelligence reports.

If true, another reason why Iraq may turn out to be America's next Vietnam, if false an excuse why Iran will be our next war.


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